Trashterpiece Theater Gets MOURNING WOOD (2010)

Trashterpiece Theater Gets MOURNING WOOD (2010) Review by Stacey Longo On a rainy day, there’s nothing like popping in MOURNING WOOD (2010) to entertain yourself. This fine movie from Fat Foot Films will have you snickering in no time. Unless, of course, your maturity level is above that of a 14-year-old boy, which fortunately, mine(…)

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Meet Columnist SPENCER SEAMS

Spencer Seams is a horror and fiction writer. He’s attending college and studying Human Services. He’ll mainly inspired by Stephan King, Ursula K. Le Guin, H.P. Lovecraft, and Ed Brubaker. He’s always been really into comedy, movies, horror, and other weird things that most people don’t care about it. His hobbies include comic books, writing,(…)

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SHARKNADO 2: THE SECOND ONE (2014)

SHARKNADO 2: THE SECOND ONE (2014)Review by Spencer Seams With tornadoes, sharks, chainsaws, and 90s pop culture icons—what could go wrong? A few things, actually. Yep, I’m talking about SHARKNADO 2: THE SECOND ONE. The sequel to the movie that captured our hearts and minds for a week or so last year. I didn’t watch(…)

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GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY (2014)

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT: GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY (2014) By L.L. Soares & Michael Arruda (THE SCENE: A prison ship floating in space. We ZOOM in on the ship and then enter the INTERIOR, where we find L.L. SOARES and MICHAEL ARRUDA in the main gathering room of a prison block. LS is having an big(…)

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Cinema Knife Fight COMING ATTRACTIONS for AUGUST 2014

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT – COMING ATTRACTIONS:AUGUST 2014by Michael Arruda and L.L. Soares (THE SCENE:  The interior of a spaceship zooming through space.  MICHAEL ARRUDA & L.L. SOARES sit at the controls.) L.L. SOARES (pressing buttons and turning knobs):  I wonder how you get satellite radio with this thing. MICHAEL ARRUDA:  Will you stop fiddling with(…)

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Bill’s Bizarre Bijou takes a ride on THE FLIGHT THAT DISAPPEARED (1961)

BILL’s BIZAREE BIJOU By William D. Carl This week’s feature presentation: THE FLIGHT THAT DISAPPEARED (1961)   Welcome to Bill’s Bizarre Bijou, where you’ll discover the strangest films ever made.  If there are alien women with too much eye-shadow and miniskirts, if papier-mâché monsters are involved, if there’s a multitude of drag queens and camp(…)

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The Distracted Critic reviews +1 (2013)

+1 (2013)Review by Paul McMahon – The Distracted Critic Message to director Dennis Iliadis, if you’re out there: When the first major event of your film makes your audience holler “You wish!” at the screen, your movie is doomed. David (Rhys Wakefield, THE PURGE, 2013) surprises Jill (Ashley Hinshaw, CHRONICLE, 2012) by driving to see(…)

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LUCY (2014)

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT: LUCY (2014) By L.L. Soares & Michael Arruda (THE SCENE:  A hallway in a hospital. L.L. SOARES and MICHAEL ARRUDA enter through some swinging doors to find themselves face-to-face with a gang of gun-toting Asian bad guys.) LS: I told you we should have turned right when we got out of the(…)

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HERCULES (2014)

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT: HERCULES (2014)Review by Michael Arruda & L.L. Soares (THE SCENE:  Ancient Greece, outside an enormous fortress.  A large army is training on the grounds, preparing for a great battle.  Camera pans by as warriors are busy teaching soldiers the art of war and finally settles upon MICHAEL ARRUDA & L.L. SOARES training(…)

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SEX TAPE (2014)

MOVIE REVIEW:  SEX TAPE (2014)By Michael Arruda  There’s a sequence in SEX TAPE, the new comedy starring Cameron Diaz and Jason Segel, where the characters played by Diaz and Segel struggle to be intimate.  They try everything, but nothing seems to work.  It’s one of the movie’s more honest scenes, but it’s also symptomatic of(…)

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